Monday 10 December 2012

Psychology

Never express to the ones who won't express to you. It would always make you vulnerable. Well these are some interesting lines I read in an article I came across recently. 

You might wonder why anyone would put effort into a friendship when the other person just doesn't seem to care.


There are several reasons why unbalanced friendships occur. Typically one person:

Mistakenly believes they are close friends while the other thinks they are acquaintances.

Unhappy situations which results in a need for someone to confide emotionally after being silent for years. Etc (Rest left to your imagination)

Friendships that are unbalanced, which means that one person tends to have more vested emotionally in the relationship, can be difficult on many levels. While these types of relationships may satisfy a temporary desire for close friendship, ultimately they can leave the person that put more effort into the friendship feeling sad, belittled, angry, or any combination.

The key characteristic of an unbalanced friendship is consistency. In an unbalanced friendship, one person repeatedly "keeps the friendship going" while the other seems to care less about the relationship. Well power in any relationship lies with the person who cares less

Signs of an unbalanced friendship include:

Only on person repeatedly calls or mails to get a response from the other.

Where one person never notices half the things being said.

One tends to act differently when different people are around etc (it would become too boring if I put all the points I read. Imagine the rest ;))

The great part about unbalanced friendships is that they are very easy to walk away from emotionally. If you are the one putting the effort into keeping in touch, simply stop and move on. Talk to those who are willing to talk to you. Express to ones who express to you. Very often in one-sided friendships, the self-absorbed friend won't even notice or care enough to contact you to find out what is the matter or would not notice the change that you actually stopped talking many things you used to share. Every person is important in life. So it’s better to keep in touch without vesting anything emotionally.

If your friend does contact you at some point, be cautious with how much effort you put into the friendship going forward. You may be dealing with someone who just doesn't get what friendship is all about. If you find that your friendship immediately falls back to an unbalanced state, distance from that person for good.

Stop screaming your emotions and self analyze as to where you are going wrong.

Don't start the blame game. And blame the other person for not considering you as important as you consider them. World is no paradise for everyone we relate to relate back to us. But the world is no hell either.  Each person has right to choose who they want in their life. So choose yours well :) Stop finding fault and mould yourself for the better.

There is a thin line of difference between non expression and lack of substance and respect. Don't let your optimism become absolute stupidity.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets.

Keep smiling :)

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